hey, here today right now im going to tell all u guys some things that I havent told many people, some very special things about me. I'm not asking for sympathy or anything like that but fan mail would be appreciated. I'm knew to this fourum community thing and i hate to admit that this is one of the few posts ive ever made online. Well, I'm a real self-conscionce guy so this may all sound really stupid cus im trying to make it sound nice and not idiotic but some how it always comes out that way. Yeah, I should probably send some bullshit cus all i want is another shell to play with but here it goes. What goes on in enstewy's life.
I live in Orange County. And yes, the same orange county as that shallow TV show that wouldnt be so bad if they actually depicted the area as it really is. Anyways, I used to be a mute (you know someone who doesn't talk), all through elementary school. I wasn't depressed or pissed off or anything like that. I was just apethetic. I didn't care for much anything and I didn't have anything to complain about. At my school and community I had no one to be afraid of. No bullies freaks or rampant horney homosexuals. I lived in a modern day Utopia. Life was not great and it didnt suck, is was just.... , yeah it was just ...........................................
When I got into elementary school I began to feel that something was wrong, like my life was becoming a thing from the uncanny x-men #132-138(if you know what happened in this saga I want you to reply it to me and Ill say "great job" and we'll talk because I already like u). It was all of a sudden getting complicated and I hadn't a reason why. I still dont know why and my psychology always bothers me today. At this time I was a pretty smart kid. Getting less than an A was pretty rare for me. I still hate it to this day that I didn't use my smarts for something, anything. Well, I began to get anxious and scared. I felt less than a person. I felt empty. I was hollow beneath my skin. You may seem confused, but so was I, very confused. New thoughts came to me that never had before. Like I have to be more social, more attractive, trendy and cool. Be more like this kid, look at all the people he can attract and communicate with. So I gave it a try, however with no avail. I soon realized it was too late to become social. To join a comunity that has known eachother for years and has also known that I was outside of their click. But I didnt give up. I made friends and acquatences with all the other outcasts and loners. I got good at this. I began to associate myself soully with the loners and began to despise the trendy. I know, I'm contradicting myself because if a loner has a friend he transfroms into a non-loner, but I noticed something about these people that the social and the attractive did not have. I cannot explain it but I loved these guys to the core the center the great inner workings(I'm not gay by the way, but power to the gays anyway). Well yeah I just got bored at writing this so im done for tonight maby ill finish it tomarrow. then itl be 2 out of 15. Python rules.


